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What To Do If You Are a Victim

What the Archdiocese Is Doing
What the U.S. Bishops Are Doing
Reflections on the Sex Abuse Crisis
What to Do If Your Priest Is Accused
 

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What to Do If You Are
a Victim of Sexual Abuse
by Church Personnel

    The Catholic community as well as the wider community continues to suffer the devastating consequences of the sexual abuse of minors by priests and other church personnel.  We continue to grieve and to pray for the victims of this abuse and for their families, and for all who have been injured or hurt by the scandal.  As Pope John Paul II said, the sexual abuse of children and young people "is rightly considered a crime by society; it is also an appalling sin in the eyes of God."
    The pastors and pastoral staff members of the Waterloo parishes re available to visit with anyone, including victims and family members, who wish to discuss any aspect of the abuse scandal in a private and confidential way.

     If you or someone you know has been the victim of sexual abuse by a priest, deacon, or individual representing the Catholic Church there are several things you can do:
• You may contact the appropriate law enforcement agency to determine if the
   abuse falls within the statute of limitations in the jurisdiction in which the
   offense occurred.
• You may contact local child protection agencies, a private attorney, or a
   support group.
• You may contact a victim assistance coordinator in the diocese where the
   abuse occurred.

In the Archdiocese of Dubuque, professional Victim Assistance Coordinators are available to receive reports of abuse, help victims contact civil authorities, and provide referrals for spiritual care, mental health services, social services, and support groups. 

Archdiocese of Dubuque Victims Assistance Coordinators
Dr. Thomas Anderegg (phone 563-556-1225)
Joan Hoffmann (phone 866-319-4636)

These Victim Assistance Coordinators are under contract to provide services to the Archdiocese; they are not employees of the Archdiocese.

• You may also report abuse to:
   Archdiocese of Dubuque Office of Child Protection (phone 800-876-3546)
   Iowa Child Abuse Reporting Hotline (phone 800-362-2178)

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What the Archdiocese is Doing

Sexual Misconduct Policy (1993)
Policy for the Protection of Minors (2006)
Annual Compliance Reports and Audits
Archbishop's Public Apology/April 10, 2008
Table of Accused Priests

What The U.S. Bishops Are Doing

 Text of the Charter for the Protection of Children and Young People  
Annual Report on the Implementation of the Charter
List of Victim Assistance Coordinators in U.S. Dioceses


Response of U.S. Catholics to the Abuse Crisis/CARA Survey 2002

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Reflections on the Sex Abuse Crisis in the Catholic Church

    The entire Catholic community is affected in one way or another by the sex abuse of minors by church ministers.  Although the effect of the crisis on the general Catholic population pales in comparison to the devastating personal impact felt by the victims and their families, all of us struggle to make sense out of this tragedy and crime.  We offer these reflections to help Catholics, particularly those who are not immediately or personally involved, address the wide range of emotions and reactions which the abuse scandal evokes. 

The opinions and facts expressed in these reflections do not necessarily reflect the opinions of, or constitute an admission of fact by, the pastors or staff members of the Catholic parishes in Waterloo or the Archdiocese of Dubuque.

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Most Rev. Jerome Hanus OSB
Archbishop of Dubuque

   It has been almost five years since the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops met in Dallas, Texas, to address the issue of clergy sexual abuse of minors.  Out of that meeting came the framework for all dioceses throughout the United States to develop programs to reach out to victims of clergy sexual abuse and also to provide a safe environment for all God’s children.  The Charter for the Protection of Children and Young People included four main goals to guide our programs:
1. To Promote Healing and Reconciliation With Victims/Survivors of Sexual
    Abuse of Minors.
2. To Guarantee an Effective Response to Allegations of Sexual Abuse of
    Minors.
3. To Ensure the Accountability of Our Procedures.

4. To Protect the Faithful in the Future. . . .
  
In the name of the entire Archdiocese, I again express my profound sorrow for what victims have endured.  It is my hope that the support and understanding that have been offered to victims will give them a sense of affirmation and validation.
    Some members of the Church and of the wider public have doubts and objections in regard to the allegations and the monetary settlements.  I urge all to be understanding and sympathetic.  The abuse perpetrated by Church personnel was awful and cries to heaven for vengeance.  I grieve particularly for the victims whose faith in God has been weakened or destroyed by the abuse.  I hope and pray that trust in the Church may not be lost forever.

    In closing, I ask all parishes to continue to include victims and survivors of sexual abuse in their prayers.  May God grant us an increase in compassion, understanding, and resolve.

The full text of the Archbishop’s annual report, which explains actions taken by the Archdiocese to comply with the Charter for the Protection of Children and Young People, is available online at:
< www.arch.pvt.k12.ia.us/Protection/Protectionhome.html >

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Friar Jack Wintz, O.F.M.
Columnist and former editor of  St. Anthony Messenger Press.

    Like many of you, my heart is heavy whenever I read, see or hear media reports and commentaries about clergy sexual abuse and the Catholic Church. Although I don’t feel qualified to comment in an expert way on this complicated issue, I do want to respond to the concerns, frustration and even anger that many of you have expressed….
   
As others have pointed out, the greatest scandal on the part of the Church is our failure to put the child victims and their families first. In some dioceses, unfortunately, Church leaders have made the cover-up of these scandals and the offending priests their most important priority. How did we get our priorities reversed in this way?
    Into our Catholic hierarchical system, at least in some instances, has seeped the tendency and practice of covering up faults. The system seems to give those higher up such importance, dignity and sacredness that their reputation must be protected at all costs. Even those at the bottom often “buy into” this layered arrangement that tends to give special privilege to those on top. If we look at the Gospels, however, we notice that this was not the mindset of Jesus. He often called those in leadership to task for giving scandal or laying oppressive burdens on those in their charge. He told those in leadership to be servants of the others….

    One consequence of the clergy sex-abuse scandal is that the faulty priorities of the hierarchical system have now been unmasked for the whole world to see, and changes will have to be made. Structures of privilege, secrecy and protection from blame seem to be unraveling before our eyes.

    Meanwhile, the Church majority, made up of laymen and laywomen and their children, are beginning to see their rights and dignity properly recognized. They are more and more seeing themselves not simply as servants of the higher-ups whose only role in the Church is to pray, pay and obey. Now they are more fully aware that their voices deserve to be heard and respected as they claim their rightful place in the Church envisioned by Vatican II….

    Despite our failures as a Church regarding the tragic sexual abuse of children, it’s helpful to examine the issue from a wider perspective. Clergy sexual abuse is an issue that extends well beyond the Roman Catholic Church and contains more complexities than meet the eye….
    Even an institution as simple as the family tends to be self-protecting and secretive regarding abusive behavior within it own ranks. I think it is generally agreed that most cases of sexual abuse of children happens within the family. The perpetrators often are older family members, relatives, family friends, babysitters.  The first instinct is often for the family leaders to keep sexual abuse from going public. We know, of course, that such cover-ups are not right, especially if the victims remain at risk. Yet we all recognize the temptation most people have to cover up mistakes and sins of which they are ashamed. 
    This is all the more true as we explore more complex institutions—athletic or youth associations (e.g., teams or scouts), educational institutions, police departments, the military, religious institutions of all kinds, political parties, medical associations, psychological associations, big companies like Enron, even news networks and TV conglomerates. Most institutions and power structures try to protect their reputations and keep their secret sins hidden. Again this is not right. Those victimized by such organizations should be protected and the offenders reported and brought to justice. One wonders at times, however, why the media and other groups sometimes go after certain offenders and systems with more fervor and fury than they go after others….
    Another observation I heard or read within the last two weeks, which brought me a bit of light regarding the tendency on the part of Church leaders to give priest offenders a second chance, is that the Gospel of Jesus teaches us to be forgiving. It is not surprising that those who have not digested the truth about pedophilia being an incurable disorder and who have been trained to be forgiving could err on the side of being too lenient with sex offenders—a deadly mistake that hopefully is being quickly corrected in the wake of the current scandals.
    A final note for us during this Easter season: We do not face these problems and crises alone. The Risen Jesus, who has triumphed over sin and death, breathes the Spirit of forgiveness and healing upon us and walks with us toward Pentecost.

Fr. Wintz’s remarks appeared in his online newsletter, “Friar Jack’s E-Inspirations,” on April 8, 2002.  You can read the full text of his comments at:
www.americancatholic.org/e-News/FriarJack/fj040802.asp .

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Fr. Ronald Rolheiser, OMI
Syndicated Columnist

    …As Christians we’re asked to carry this scandal biblically.  What does that mean?  Carrying something biblically means a number of interpenetrating things:
1.
Name the moment.  Not everything can be fixed or cured, but it needs to be named properly….  This scandal, this particular time in our history as a Catholic Church in America, is a moment of humiliation, a moment of humbling, a moment of pruning.  We must begin the process of healing by clearly, and with courage, naming that….
2. The call to compassion.
  …To carry something biblically means, first of all, to re-ground ourselves in the non-negotiables of Christian compassion – respect, tolerance, patience and graciousness….  It’s easy to be selective in our sympathy, offering our compassion at those places where we feel good and clean when we give it and withholding it from those people and places where we don’t get a good, clean feeling when we offer it….
3. Healing, not self-protection and security.
  …[H]ealing, not self-protection and security, must be our real preoccupation….To protect the innocent and to bring about healing and reconciliation.  Everything else (worries about security, lawsuits, and the like) must come afterwards.  Part of this is how we must understand the role of the media and press in all of this….  They are not the problem….Granted that sometimes their coverage hasn’t been fair, but that’s ultimately not the issue.  Beneath it all, the substance is true.
4. Carrying this crisis is not our primary ministry and not a distraction to our ministry. 
Carrying this scandal properly is something that the church is invited to do right now for the sake of the culture….There are very few things that we are doing as Christian communities today that are more important than helping the world deal with this issue…. Crucifixions are never easy and they exact real blood!  It might well be worth it in the long run if we can help our world come to grips with this.
5. Painful humiliation as a grace-opportunity. 
Purification and pruning, humiliation leading to humility….  Today the Body of Christ is not just being humbled, it’s being humiliated and we have the chance to come to humility through that.  This is an important grace-opportunity for all of us inside the church.  Biblically, it’s our “Agony in the Garden.”
6. To carry this scandal biblically asks of us “a new song.” 
[What is] being asked of us in this scandal [is this]: Can we love, forgive, reach out, and be empathic in a new way?  Can we have compassion for both the victim and the perpetrator?  Can we have compassion for some of our church leaders who made some blunders?  Can we give our money when it seems we are paying for someone else’s sin?  Can we help carry one of the darker sides of our history without protesting its unfairness and distancing ourselves from it?  Can we carry a tension that’s unfair to us for the sake of a greater good?...
7. We need to “ponder” as Mary did. 
…To ponder in the biblical sense means to hold, to carry, and transform tension so as not to give it back in kind….  To ponder biblically is to be like a water purifier; it takes in all kinds of impurities with the water, but it holds the impurities inside of itself and gives back only the pure water.  That is what Mary did under the cross…. And that is what we are called upon to do…and that is what we are called upon to do in helping to carry this scandal biblically, namely, to hold, carry and transform this tension so as not to give back in kind – hurt for hurt, bitterness for bitterness, accusation for accusation, anger for anger, blame for blame.
8. We must reaffirm our faith in God as Lord. 
…Our prayer in times of crisis must be a prayer that precisely affirms that God is still Lord of this world….  We need, in the midst of this crisis, to affirm our faith in the lordship of God.  God is still firmly in charge….  The church isn’t dying.  Crucifixions don’t end life, they lead to new, enriched life.
9. We must patiently stay with the pain. 
This is a dark night of the soul which is meant, like every dark night of the soul, to stretch the heart.  To be stretched is always painful and our normal impulse is always to do something to end the pain….  But the pain won’t go away until we learn the lesson that it’s meant to teach us….  And what is it meant to teach us, beyond a new humility?  That there is a terrible pain within the culture right now, the soul-devastation caused by sexual abuse, and we, the church, are being asked to be like Christ, namely, to have our flesh be food for the life of the world so that this wound might be opened to healing.

 The complete text of Fr. Rolheiser’s essay is available online at:
<
www.ronrolheiser.com/pdfs/scandal.pdf >.

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F
or Futher Reflection

Readers may find the following articles helpful for further reflection.  The opinions and facts expressed in these articles do not necessarily reflect the opinions of, or constitute an admission of fact by, the pastors or staff members of the Catholic parishes in Waterloo or the Archdiocese of Dubuque.

“The Catholic Church and Child Sexual Abuse” in America magazine, April 22, 2002.
< http://www.americamagazine.org/gettext.cfm?textID=1721&articleTypeID=1&issueID=369 >

St. Anthony Messenger (special issue) June 2003.
< http://www.americancatholic.org/News/ClergySexAbuse/ >].

• "Healing the Wound" by Eugene Kennedy in National Catholic Reporter, October 3, 2003.
<http://natcath.org/NCR_Online/archives2/2003d/100303/100303a.php>

“On Carrying a Scandal Biblically” by Fr. Ron Rolheiser.
< www.ronrolheiser.com/pdfs/scandal.pdf >
  You may also find some of Fr. Rolheiser syndicated columns helpful, even if they do not directly address the abuse issue.  You can access past columns at:
< www.ronrolheiser.com/columnarchive >

“Beyond Crime and Punishment” by Fr. Richard Rohr in the July/August issue of Sojourners magazine.
<
http://www.sojo.net/index.cfm?action=magazine.article&issue=soj0207&article=020711>

“Answering Scandal with Personal Holiness” homily by Fr. Thomas Landry
< http://catholiceducation.org/articles/religion/re0526.html >

Continuing coverage in U.S. Catholic magazine.
<http://uscatholic.claretians.org/site/PageServer?pagename=usc_webspecial_sexabusecrisis>].

Fr. Jack Wintz’s “Friar Jack’s E-Inspirations” for April 8, 2002.
<www.americancatholic.org/e-news/FriarJack/fj040802.asp >].

“Prayer in a Time of Church Crisis” by the Daughters of St. Paul.
<http://www.daughtersofstpaul.com/church/prayer/guidedpryerfidelity.html>

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What to do if your priest is accused
of abuse

These suggestions were prepared by the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests (SNAP).

1) Remain open-minded.
The natural human instinct is to recoil from alleged horror, and to immediately assume that the allegations are false. But the overwhelming majority of abuse disclosures prove to be true.    In every case, the proper and Christian response is to remain open-minded.
2) Pray for all parties involved.
Every person involved deserves and needs prayerful support.
3) Let yourself feel whatever emotions arise.
You may feel angry, betrayed, confused, hurt, worried and sad. These are all natural, "typical" responses to an allegation of sexual abuse. None of these feelings are inappropriate or "bad." Don't "kick yourself" for feeling any of these emotions.
4) Remember that abuse, sadly, is quite common.
It's far more widespread than any of us would like to believe. Experts estimate that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 9 boys will be molested in their lifetimes.
5) Don't try to "guess" or figure out who the accuser is.
Abuse victims, like rape victims, need their privacy to recover from their trauma. Openly speculating about who is alleging abuse is essentially gossiping, and helps to create a hostile climate that will keep other victims (even those abused by non-clerical perpetrators) from coming forward.
6) If you do know the victim(s), protect his/her confidentiality.
There are many good reasons why abuse victims are unable to publicly come forward. Often, the person wants to keep his/her elderly parents or young children from suffering too. Don't compound the pain he/she is in by disclosing his/her identity to others.
7) Understand that abuse victims often have "troubled" backgrounds (i.e. drug or alcohol problems, criminal backgrounds, etc.)
Instead of undermining the credibility of accusers, these difficulties actually enhance their credibility. (When someone is physically hurt, there are almost always clear signs of harm; so too with sexual abuse. The harm is reflected largely in self-destructive behaviors. One might be skeptical of a person who claimed to have been run over by a truck but showed no bodily injury. Similarly, one might be skeptical of an alleged molestation victim who always acted like a "model citizen.")
8) Don't allow the mere passage of time to discredit the accusers.
Stress to your fellow parishioners that there are many good reasons why abuse victims disclose their victimization years after the crime. In most instances, victims come forward when they are emotionally able to do so, and feel capable of risking disbelief and rejection from precious loved ones, including family members, church leaders, other authorities, and fellow Catholics. Sometimes, they are psychologically able to do so only after their perpetrator has died, moved or been accused by someone else. Sometimes, they have been assured that their perpetrator would never be around kids again, but have learned that this isn't the case.  (In other cases, it takes years before victims are able to understand and/or acknowledge to themselves that they have been sexually violated. This is a common defense mechanism.)
9) Ask your family members and friends if they were victimized.
Many times, abuse victims will continue to "keep the secret" unless specifically invited to disclose their victimization by someone they love and trust. Even raising this topic can be very uncomfortable. But it must be done. It may be very awkward and your family members may even act resentful at first. But soon they will remember that you really care about them, and will see your question as a sign of that care.
10) Mention the accusation to former parishioners and parish staff now living elsewhere.
They may have information that could prove the guilt or innocence of the priest facing allegations. This is especially important because sometimes abuse victims or their families move away after experiencing abuse.
11) Contact the police or prosecutors.
It's your duty as a citizen to call the proper civil authorities if you have any information (even if it's "second hand" or vague) that might help prove the guilt or innocence of the accused. It's your duty as a Christian to help seek justice and protect others from harm. Remember: abuse thrives in secrecy. Exposing a physical wound to fresh air, clean water and sunlight can be healing. Exposing sexual crimes is also ultimately healing. And remember that police and prosecutors are unbiased professionals with the skills and experience needed to ascertain whether an allegation is true or false.
12) Don't allow other parishioners to make disparaging comments about those making the allegation.
Remember, the sexual abuse of children has terribly damaging effects. As a Christian, you want to help prevent such victimization. And you want anyone who is in pain to get help as soon as possible. Critical comments about those who make allegations only discourage others who may have been hurt. Such remarks prevent those who need help from reaching out and getting it. Show your compassion for abuse victims. Tell your fellow parishioners that hurtful comments are inappropriate. Remind them that they can defend their priest without attacking his accuser.
13) Educate yourself and your family about sexual abuse.
There are many excellent books and resources on the subject. There are also good books specifically about molestation by clerics (Jason Berry's Lead Us Not Into Temptation, Frank Bruni & Elinor Burkett's Gospel of Shame, and the Boston Globe's Betrayal). Check out the web site for clergy abuse victims: SNAPnetwork.org
14) Support the accused priest PRIVATELY.
Calls, visits, letters, gifts, and prayers - all of these are appropriate ways to express your love and concern for the accused priest. Public displays of support, however, are not. They only intimidate others into keeping silent. In fact, it is terribly hurtful to victims to see parishioners openly rallying behind an accused priest. You may want to publicly defend a priest, collect funds for the priest's defense, and take similar steps. Please don't. Express your appreciation of the priest in a direct, quiet ways. Even if the priest is innocent, somewhere in the parish is a young girl being molested by a relative or a boy being abused by his coach or youth leader. If these children see adults they love and respect publicly rallying around accused perpetrators, they will be less likely to report their own victimization to their parents, the police, or other authorities. They will be scared into remaining silent, and their horrific pain will continue.
15) Don't be blinded by the pain you can see.
The trauma of the accused priest, and those who care about him, is obvious. You can usually see it in his face, his posture, and his actions. But please try to keep in mind the trauma of the accuser too. Because you rarely see his/her pain directly, it's important to try and imagine it. This helps you keep a balanced perspective.
16) Try to put yourself in the shoes of the alleged victim.
It's easy to identify with the priest. Most Catholics have met dozens of priests and know them as warm and wonderful individuals. On the other hand, few Catholics have met clergy abuse survivors. In the gospels, Jesus calls us to identify with the hurting, the vulnerable, and the innocent, the hurting. Try, as best you can, to imagine the shame, self-blame, confusion and fear that afflict men and women who have been victimized by trusted religious authority figures.
17) Use this painful time as an opportunity to protect your own family.
Talk with your children about "safe touch," the private parts of their bodies, who is allowed to touch those parts, what to do if someone else tries, and who to tell. Urge your sons and daughters to have similar conversations with your grandchildren.
18) Turn your pain into helpful action.
In times of stress and trauma, doing something constructive can be very beneficial. Volunteer your time or donate your funds to organizations that help abused kids or work to stop molestation.
19) Keep in mind the fundamental choice you face.
On the one hand, at stake are the feelings of a grown up. On the other hand, at stake is the physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual and sexual safety of potentially many children. If one has to err in either direction, the prudent and moral choice is to always err on the side of protecting those who can't protect themselves: children. Remember too that it's easier for an adult to repair his reputation than for a child (or many children) to repair his/her psyche and life. Another way to look at this: Being falsely accused of abuse is horrific. But actually being abused, then being attacked or disbelieved is far worse.
20) Ask your pastor to bring in an outside expert or a therapist who can lead a balanced discussion about sexual abuse.
Therapists understand and can answer the questions you and your fellow parishioners are facing, and help you deal with the emotional impact of this trauma too.
21) Urge your bishop, pastor and other diocesan or parish employees to follow these guidelines too.

Created 05.07   Last Update 04.10.08

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